I’ve spent the first few days seeing my family. Bumping into other people. Gradually organising catch-ups with my friends. I’ve also started my new job, while keeping my former one around to bolster the funds.
Other than maybe one or two things, nothing has changed. The buildings are the same. The same people are on TV. It’s just like Melbourne paused when I left and now it has re-started again.
The disconnected feeling really sprung up on me as I was sitting on a train home from the city and I realised I had looked at the same buildings a hundred times and now I was looking at them all over again.
It just felt like my life has slipped back into the mind-numbingly mundane reality that I was experiencing before. Although before I left I was hanging onto the fact I was working towards my trip. The main goal of my year. I would fill my nights after university and work reading my guides back to front and researching online all I could about my holiday.
But for now now that’s all over.
I’m finding it hard adjusting after four months. I can’t imagine what travelling for a year will feel like.
I know I will be OK and my first world problem will be taken up by another. Eventually I’ll slip back into the routine, build up the savings.
I can spend time focusing on other parts of my life I enjoy. See my favourite people. Maybe go to language classes. Do things which you can’t do when you’re moving from place to place all the time.
Although I think I still haven’t done the full leap of going and not knowing when you’re going to return. Along with the anticipation and fear of having no certainty with a stable job to fill your depleted bank account when you get home. One day I hope to push myself to that point and really embrace the nomadic lifestyle, for a period of time anyway.
But for now, I’m feeling disconnected. The depression I believe hasn't fully set in. I’m hoping I can throw myself fully into my jobs and keep myself too occupied in the hope it doesn’t creep up on me.
But my wish to be back out on the road hasn’t abated. I’ve already wandered into three bookshops to gaze at guidebooks. I know that it’s only a matter of time before I start writing about my new travel goals and the way I plan to get there.
~ Olivia (WM)
NB: I’m planning to write a thorough review of the internship experience I did in Shanghai, China. I’ll publish it in about two weeks or so. If a reader has done an internship overseas and would be interested in contributing their thoughts about the experience, I would love to hear from you! Get in touch through the comment section below or through the ‘contact’ page on the site.